If I was a character in a book what word picture would be painted? If someone were giving me a toast what adjectives would be used? When asked to describe myself in three words I choose creative, empathetic and open-minded. In none of these answers would I expect to hear sick. Yet, that seems to be the first thing people think about me. I used to be the friend that was fun, funny and even the ubiquitous 'so nice'. Now the first thing that gets mentioned is that I can't have pizza and beer.
I used to be annoyed when I was described by how I looked as if that somehow was important to who I was. But at least my style, hair color/cut or tattoos are choices I've made, an expression of self that hints at who I am. Being sick is not a choice.
I do realize that having Celiac Disease influences who I am. I am now overly aware of cosmetic ingredients and how to read food labels. Being spontaneous with food is no longer an option and I have a new appreciation for good days. But when you hear someone has Celiac Disease you don't think she must know a lot about nutrition, instead you think she's weak or, my personal favorite, high maintenance.
While I don't go out of my way to hide my food restriction, I don't advertise it either. I'm not embarrassed by it. It is, after all, a part of my life but so is my uncle who's gone through more girlfriends than his daughters have had birthdays. He's influenced me (by teaching me to avoid any man like him) but he is not me, nor even a close representation of me. Celiac Disease is teaching me many things, but it is not now, nor ever will be, who I am.
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